So I thought. Immediately after I had escaped the constant stream of text messages and voicemails reminding me it was all my fault. All I wanted was to move on with my life.
It was clear Damian did not want me to have a life and he wasn’t prepared to lose his power and control. To keep me fearful he sent me 20,160 hand written pages full of emotional and psychological abuse. Travelling to my place of work to stalk me. Enlisted the help of his parents- a failed kidnap attempt to take me back to where I belonged- to their son.
How did I respond ?
My time was taken up 3-4 times a week either phoning the police or sat in a police station on an evening reporting another letter, text message or being stalked by him.
” We need to have a bigger picture of what is going on. Not enough evidence, keep reporting ” -police officer
Every time I went to the police I went with the hope this would be the time they would help me and stop this war of terror against me. After 2 years of reporting the picture of what was happening wasn’t clear enough for the police and the war of terror was allowed to continue.
Where did I go for help ?
I had not only been to the police asking for help. I have contacted a Police Superintendent, Chief Inspector, two Minister’s of Justice, MP’s , Deputy Prime Minister and various organisations asking them all for help. I have been on my knees begging for help for this war of terror against me to stop. It was allowed continue either through ignorance or the threat of a personal lawsuit soon put an end to any offers of help they were quickly rescinded. In order to protect themselves from this I was used as a shield and so the abuser was allowed to continue with the war of terror. Accepting help wasn’t coming during this very traumatic time in my life was difficult.
What did I do ?
I could not change what was happening- I was totally powerless. The only power I did have was within myself and this is where I had control. I was at rock bottom- facing bankruptcy due to economic abuse used in the legal proceedings failing to attend court hearings and numerous appeals made by the abuser to purposely increase my legal fees resulted in £53k of debt. I was facing losing my business and being homeless.
I started to slowly make changes within myself these were difficult and challenging with the added on going pressure from the abuser. I kept my focus onto myself– I refused to be drawn back into a living a life life I wasn’t mean’t to have. I wanted the life I had always dreamt about and I started to build a foundation for a new life.
“I went from zero to my own hero” Stella Eden
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Stella's Open Road Trip
Stella is an author,speaker and the founder of Stella’s Open Road Trip & events-helping women affected by domestic abuse to reclaim their power- their inner self.
After 18 years of emotional, psychological, physical and economic abuse she found the strength and courage to leave. Stella made a promise to herself that her life had to be better. And with this in her mind she set upon achieving her dream in creating the life she had always imagined.
Stella was motivated by the one word she wrote on a piece of paper, this was the start of an incredible new beginning for Stella. It brought many challenges but it also showed her many things she didn’t think she was ever capable of doing and brought her to the place she always knew where she was meant to be – her true self.
Stella is passionate about self discovery and transformation. Her journey brought her to writing, speaking at events & women's support groups and forming Stella’s open road trip & events.
Stella discusses what helped her at Stella’s Open Road Trip– inspired to grow, positive vibes, and falling in love in life. Stella’s Open Road Trip is an epic journey- come & join the journey.